Emily and Bennett Smithhart never expected to foster a teenager.
But when the opportunity came to care for a teen girl they already knew, they knew they had to say yes.
They didn’t know exactly what the road ahead would look like. They didn’t know what needs would emerge or how they would navigate everything that came with welcoming a teenager into their family.
They just knew that she needed someone to say yes, so they did.
Finding the Support She Needed
Pretty quickly, Emily and Bennett realized there were some significant needs they couldn’t meet on their own, one of them being school.
Their foster daughter had a lot of academic ground to make up, and having reliable access to a computer became an important part of helping her succeed. When Emily shared that need, Koinonia was able to provide her with a Chromebook for school. It was one less thing for the Smithharts to figure out and one more practical tool they could put in her hands.
For a teenager working to catch up academically, having access to the right resources can make a meaningful difference. The Chromebook gave her the ability to complete schoolwork and have a reliable tool of her own as she continued working toward her goals.
But school was only one part of the picture. Emily and Bennett also knew their foster daughter needed a safe place to process some of the enormous emotions she was carrying. Equine therapy was recommended as a way to provide that support, however adding another expense to everything they were already navigating felt overwhelming.
Fortunately, funding became available to help cover her equine therapy sessions, via a scholarship from Angels In The Alley. That support allowed Emily and Bennett to say yes to something they believed could really help her—without having to figure out how to carry another financial burden that felt overwhelming for their family.
A Family That Doesn’t Have to Do It Alone
Perhaps what has surprised the Smithharts most about fostering is how often they have been reminded that they aren’t doing it alone.
Their Koinonia social worker has been a consistent source of both emotional and practical support as they navigate situations they had never encountered before.
Fostering a teenager can come with questions that don’t have simple answers. There are school needs, emotional needs, appointments, relationships, transitions, and the everyday challenges of helping a young person feel safe and supported.
The Smithharts have learned that they don’t have to figure everything out by themselves. When a need arises, they can reach out. When they have questions, they have someone to help them navigate them. And when something comes up that is beyond what they can reasonably provide on their own, there are people willing to come alongside them.
The Chromebook and equine therapy are tangible examples of that support, but their impact goes beyond the individual resources. They have helped Emily and Bennett continue saying yes to what their foster daughter needs without feeling like they have to carry the entire weight of fostering on their own.
Taking It One Step at a Time
The Smithharts are still taking this journey one step at a time. They don’t know exactly what the road ahead will look like, and they certainly don’t have all the answers. But they’ve learned that they don’t need to.
What they have found along the way is that fostering a teenager hasn’t been the overwhelming experience they once might have imagined. There have certainly been challenges and moments when they’ve needed support, but there have also been so many moments of joy.
For Emily and Bennett, one of the greatest privileges has been getting to give this young woman opportunities to simply be a kid. To say yes to new experiences. To encourage her interests. To watch her try new things and discover what she enjoys. To be there for the everyday moments that might seem small but can mean so much to a young person who hasn’t always had the opportunity to experience them.
They’ve discovered that teenagers aren’t quite as scary as we sometimes think they are.
Fostering a teenager wasn’t what the Smithharts expected when they first opened their home. But what began as a decision to say yes to a young person in need has become an experience they describe as deeply rewarding.
They’ve learned that saying yes doesn’t mean knowing exactly what to do or having everything figured out. Sometimes, it simply means being willing to take the next step, to learn alongside a young person, and to let them know that someone is in their corner.
And when the next need comes, they know they won’t have to meet it alone.
Kaitlin Earnest, Contributor