When Kelly and Broc began the process of becoming foster parents with Koinonia nearly three years ago, they knew it would take patience. Between buying their first home, preparing financially, and completing the licensing process, they spent months getting ready for the day a child would walk through their door.
That day finally came with a three-year-old little boy who had already experienced multiple placements before arriving at their home.
"It was our very first placement," Kelly shared. "We didn't know exactly what to expect."
Their foster son had been through a great deal of change in his young life. Like many children entering foster care, he struggled to express his emotions, often communicating through frustration, tantrums, or aggression instead of words. Kelly and Broc knew that before anything else, they needed to help him feel safe.
They filled their home with emotion charts, sensory toys, books about feelings, and consistent routines. Slowly, those small, intentional moments began to add up.
"After a few weeks, he was able to point to his feelings on the chart and then talk about them," Kelly said. "We felt like we made really big progress right away."
While there have been difficult seasons—especially as reunification has drawn closer and emotions have become more complicated—they've remained committed to walking alongside him with patience, compassion, and understanding.
Supporting Reunification Every Step of the Way
From the beginning, Kelly and Broc understood that foster care is about supporting families.
Their foster son is currently on the path toward reunification with his biological mother, and rather than viewing that as an ending, they've embraced it as something worth celebrating.
They've built a positive relationship with his mom, texting regularly, sharing photos nearly every day, helping with transportation, and exchanging information about his routines, favorite foods, and the therapeutic strategies that have helped him thrive.
"Our relationship is actually really good with her," Kelly said. "We're just trying to help make that transition as smooth as possible."
Although saying goodbye will be emotional, they're grateful that his mother wants them to remain part of his life after reunification.
"What's awesome is that we're not just completely grieving the child who has been in our home," Kelly shared. "Whether it's babysitting, meeting at the park, or celebrating birthdays, we're thankful we'll still get to be part of his story."
Honoring His Identity and Culture
One of Kelly and Broc's greatest priorities has been making sure their foster son grows up knowing and celebrating every part of who he is.
As a Black child being raised in a white foster home, they knew it was important to intentionally learn, listen, and create opportunities for him to stay connected to his culture.
Kelly's own background and experience with dance have also given her a unique way to connect her foster son to his culture. As a choreographer whose specialty is hip-hop, Kelly grew up in the Detroit area and spent years dancing as the only white person on her team. Through dance, she developed an appreciation for the culture, music, and community surrounding hip-hop.
Now, she shares that passion with her foster son. Together, they spend time listening to age-appropriate hip-hop, learning the beats, and expressing themselves through movement. They explore a variety of styles, from breaking to popping, giving him an opportunity to engage with an important part of his culture while also using dance as a form of emotional expression.
For Kelly, it has become more than simply an activity they enjoy together. Dance gives him a way to be active, explore his creativity, connect with his culture, and—sometimes—simply "dance his cares away."
Kelly and Broc intentionally surround him with a diverse community, from his multicultural preschool to the playgrounds they visit and the friendships they've built. They have also incorporated music and cultural experiences that reflect and celebrate who he is.
"Koinonia checks in to make sure we're doing cultural activities with him as well," Kelly explained. "That's been really meaningful."
Those intentional choices send an important message to their foster son: You belong. You are seen. Your identity matters.
Never Walking Alone
Like many first-time foster parents, Kelly and Broc quickly discovered that while foster care is deeply rewarding, it can also feel overwhelming.
One of the biggest differences for them was having Koinonia's support every step of the way.
When their foster son first arrived, county staffing changes meant they didn't see his county social worker for nearly a month. During that time, Koinonia became their primary source of guidance.
"Our Koinonia team was checking in on us and on him," Kelly said. "If I text them, I usually hear back within an hour. If we really need something, I trust going to them first because I know the response is going to be quicker."
Beyond quick communication, Koinonia connected them with training, educational resources, therapeutic support, and specialized programs that helped them meet their son's unique needs.
They were also introduced to a trauma-informed preschool—the only one of its kind in San Diego County—which became an important part of his healing journey.
Having someone to answer questions, manage paperwork, and offer encouragement allowed Kelly and Broc to focus on what mattered most: caring for the child in front of them.
The Heart of Foster Care
One of Kelly's favorite memories with their foster son happened during a family camping weekend at a music festival. Surrounded by music, dancing, and new experiences, he looked at them with wide eyes and said:
"Wow... this is the best day of my life."
It's a moment they'll never forget.
While foster care often includes uncertainty, difficult transitions, and goodbyes, it's also filled with moments like these—moments that remind families why saying "yes" matters.
For Kelly and Broc, fostering has never been about replacing a family. It's about strengthening one, honoring a child's story, celebrating their identity, and providing love during a season when it's needed most.
And as they prepare for whatever comes next, they know this first experience has only deepened their commitment to opening their hearts—and eventually, their home—to many more children and teens who need a safe place to belong.
Kaitlin Earnest, Contributor